Welcome to the prototypical "site" of Friendly Neighborhood Editing, a service which helps you express yourself for business or personal purposes using accurate grammar, spelling and punctuation. While the proprietor may not be a fan of the Oxford comma, he nonetheless knows what it is and how to use it, and will do so upon request.
Why would you need my particular services? Well, you might have a story to tell (perchance to sell), or a letter to write. You might even be a professional who composes reports every day. It doesn't matter. We all suffer from some bad habits. We all rush through these things sometimes, or we're too tired to concentrate on getting it just right. That's where I come in.
I will dedicate the necessary time and energy to making sure your work is spit-polished and ready for presentation to the most exacting of critics. That's right--I catch my typos right when they appear, and I don't resolve to fix them later! I've seen a lot of mistakes made by so-called "professionals" which should have been avoidable. Plus, with their credentials, some of these mistakes should never have been allowed to happen in the first place!
Were you aware of the following common mistakes?
1. A "Calvary" is not a unit of mounted soldiers. Calvary is where Jesus was crucified. A group of soldiers on horseback is referred to as a "Cavalry".
2. There is no such disease as "old-timers". The disease which affects senior citizens, causing them to lose their memory, is called "Alzheimers".
3. Another name for the President of the United States is not the "Commander and Chief". It's "Commander-in-chief".
I'll also fix every "then" which should be a "than"...and more! I am a fiction writer by nature, and I've currently got a novel on the market, as well as a website filled with my work. I also have the magic of the internet at my fingertips to research any of the more prickly questions which may arise during my analysis of your document, in order to make sure I don't miss a trick!
The rates here are simple. $5.00 per 1000 words in your document. I am cheap and effective, and I look forward to your submissions! Please note, if you wish to submit creative work, I will need to be in regular contact with you for the duration. I don't want to compromise your creativity by fixing a deliberate mistake!
Contact me at email@example.com. Do NOT attach your document until you have told me something about it and you have heard from me. I want to be able to give you a timeframe so that you can decide whether or not you have time to utilize my services.